Feeling the FOMO when going out sober?
So you recently stopped drinking or want to stop but every time you go out you have this feeling inside you telling you your missing out?
Even after almost 2 years of being sober AF, I still encounter this feeling.
I feel it the most when I am in the same or similar situations in which I used to drink in - for me, that was at home with friends, at dinner parties, or just at home alone with my kid - cooking dinner or maybe not, and there is always wine involved. Man I loved the wine.
What I loved most about it was the closeness it gave me to connect to those I loved the most. It also gave me an out on looking at my drinking patterns because lets be real, excessive wine consumption has been promoted as completely acceptable to women like me; Stay at home mom and wife with a vast social network and a husband that works out of town and provides me with all the shiny things. Wine allowed me to still drink in excess while also feeling classy doing it, whether that was at home alone with my kid or at a fancy dinner party or out for a night spending way too much money at some winery restaurant.
During this journey of sobriety I still get the feeling when I am in those same situations but let me tell you something, it has lessened immensely.
Here is what I have learned along the way to keep my FOMO monster at bay:
As long as I am have some kind of fancy mocktail in hand and I feel special too, I am still able to be one with the group. (Check out my Pinterest for all my mocktail recipes!)
In the early stages of sobriety, I NEEDED to have a sidekick - someone that was on the same sober path or someone that would agree to be sober and support me for the evening out. This was my crutch that I still utilize in a lot of situations.
I always leave the party by midnight - just like Cinderella! Nothing good happens after midnight. People get past the point of buzzed and maybe get a little too grabby or a little too loose lipped (and guess what, you remember all of it), or they are too drunk and decide that cocaine is a good idea, in which case, the conversation turns from talking to each other to people talking at you. In any case, heed my warning and leave before midnight or who knows, someone might just turn into a pumpkin along the way.
Make sure you have your own ride home. And guess what? You’ll be sober so you can drive you pretty behind anywhere you want to at any time in the night, like the free bird that you are.
Accept the fact that sometimes you just won’t be into it. Drunk people can be annoying sometimes - maybe you had a crappy day at work or your kids were on your nerves or you broke a nail - whatever the reason, be kind to yourself. And don’t worry, there will be a million other opportunities to take your new found sobriety out for a test drive to another party or social gathering very soon as we are social creatures, and most of whom haven’t gotten the memo that alcohol sucks yet. Go home, have a bath, make early morning workout plans if thats your thing, text me to tell me your home safe and sober, and wake up not feeling like crap the next day.
